Social networking is not a substitute.

I think this ramble is a bit of a reiteration of my first couple of posts on this blogspot, but the topic has been refreshed in my mind this week. I know I said that twitter is just fun, and that is all it should be and facebook I tend to keep more for my 3D friends but I have realised (again) that there is a little more to it.

A few weeks ago a 3D friend removed me from Facebook, this led to a confrontation (via text) and the eventual realisation that for some unknown (and some inaccurate) reason she wishes to disassociate herself from me. This was upsetting in itself, and sounds like the stuff of school playgrounds. Is this what the world has come to? Do friends not argue and fall out in person any more, where issues can be debated like grown ups? My concern is that by using social networking like facebook and twitter with 3D friends (defined as people I see more often face to face and have known for some time in case you forgot), we are removed from the context. I don't know about anyone else but I find it easier to have an opinion which is considered and planned out by using such mediums. I'm not sure this is always beneficial where an emotional dispute needs to occur. Saying things on the spur of the moment means that things actually get said and then dealt with. I am reminded of this tonight having spoke to two other friends who have now been banished using the facebook dumping method, they were understandably upset, and with no explanation were too shocked at the immaturity of an action.

I was also reminded this week that sometimes things said on twitter and elsewhere in the virtual world can also intentionally or unintentionally hurt people's feelings. I know the majority of people using such mediums do not mean any harm, but it does happen. It may be that someone takes things the wrong way, or has had a bad day. I'm not saying that we can protect ourselves or others from this, but I do wonder about my emotional responsibility. It sounds heavy, but it isn't. I have several friends pending in my facebook account, this is because I'm not sure who they are and I like to keep my facebook profile rather selective. However, I have not explained this to them, so as far as they know I have rejected their request. Is this rude? What is the etiquette? I also try to reply to most people who reply to me on twitter, it is basic good manners. But my question is, should there be manners and etiquette in the virtual world? I understand celebrities not responding to everyone (they would be there all day) but the few replies the most of us get are easy to manage.

I remain partially detached from social networking sites, in that they get a version of me/what I am thinking; the image I wish to project. Yet, I have found that I can still be hurt by them, I can imagine the situation where I could take a tweet/facebook comment the wrong way. The above situation is different in that I think it should have been managed differently.

I think I need to summarise this ramble, as it is a bit more unplanned than usual, so my key points are (and remember this is just my opinion, feel free to disagree/comment):-

- Social networking sites are not a replacement for open discussion with 3D friends, nor are they an appropriate way of ending any sort of relationship. At least explain such actions.

- I am aware that some people struggle with social 3D situations but if you have 3D friends I would suggest trying to keep them that way (at least some of the time). Emotions are difficult to read and often misinterpreted in the virtual world.

- It is polite to reply to people if you can, even if you don't follow them, you never know you may get to know them and follow them in the end. Unless they are rude/offensive/inappropriate etc. Us none celebrities can usually manage this most of the time.

As usual these are my thoughts, so feel free to discuss anything you think I have misjudged with me on here or twitter. Thanks for reading. (I feel better after this one, maybe it was more of a rant?).