Prompted by a few online conversations I have realised how much I have learnt in the last year or so. Partly because I became a non medical prescriber (I blogged a bit about ignorance being bliss on this topic here). So I accumulated much more knowledge about psychopharmacology, legal and ethical issues in prescribing. But also through delving into skepticism, rationalism and critical thinking. (Let’s not forget comedy too, knowing about the comedy scene is also knowledge, perhaps not particularly useful although I have reaped some benefits.)
Don’t get me wrong, I have not mastered any of the above subjects yet. This is my point. By realising I have an interest in or a need to learn about such subjects, I have discovered how much information is out there that I do not know. It is almost overwhelming. The books I haven’t read, theories and views I don’t understand (the acts I haven’t seen yet). I realise that we can’t expect to be experts in all the subjects we have an interest in, but perhaps we do hope to acquire enough knowledge to have a reasonable informed conversation about such issues? (This is where I am ok with my comedy knowledge, but I still love to find/learn more).
I think my fear and realisation may stem from the fact that I think or assume that my memory is not very good. However, there may be evidence to the contrary. Firstly anecdotally, in a chat with a friend I said much the same and she exclaimed, “But you know loads!” and we discussed it from there. I guess I do have some knowledge about things, but I recall when at university the first time I used to memorise references for exam essays and could rattle off numerous theories and viewpoints easily. Thinking about this rationally I realise I used to study for hours in order to have such information at the forefront of my memory. Secondly, in certain subjects I do “know loads”, I know my job and am not bad on mental health law, NICE guidelines, Clozapine and ECT, but these are topics I work with on a daily basis. I am constantly learning but as a scenario crops up I can recall similar situations and figure out a solution or where to look for the answer. In my job I may be considered “an expert” (I am the Lead Clinician).
I would like to feel the same confidence in discussing other topics, one not work related but to my opinions and beliefs. However I find myself attempting to discuss the issues and relying on “Have you read...” then failing to summarise how the viewpoint in the book matched or differed from my own. I am hoping that as I read more, learn more and blog more my skills and memory for such facts may improve.
Much like when at university, and even more so when nurse training, I recall the panic in the first few weeks of not thinking I would be able to acquire all the knowledge I needed to pass the course/qualify. But bit by bit as these course progressed and my brain began to link the information and ground it in my daily knowledge, then hey presto. I knew stuff, and of course I passed and qualified. I must admit I had the same crippling fear when I began nursing and did my first week of night shifts. They were terrifying, and there were not many people around to back me up, what if I didn’t know what to do and people were busy? Thankfully in my first week of nights I had the pleasure of working with a very wise nurse (they don’t leave you on your own on nights at first) who told me “I have been a psych nurse for nearly 30 years and I am still learning.” Boom, it hit me then in that moment, I didn’t need to know everything I can keep learning, I can ask, I can look in books, journals, policies and guidance notes. From then on I was not frightened of my lack of knowledge and learned to enjoy finding things out I wasn’t so sure about, also as a team nurses and doctors constantly teach each other.
As I hoped would happen, in typing this blog, I am now panicking much less. I should treat my new thirst for knowledge and fear of a lack of it, just as I did in university and when I started nursing. I should recognise that there will come a point when the information fits together and I gain some confidence, but that I will also continue to learn from a variety of sources. Phew, I feel better now.
Thanks if you read this.
I feel very much the same. I feel like I've learned loads about science and scepticism (and comedy) this year but there is still so much I don't know and I want to learn more but I just don't seem to have the time. Aren't we lucky that so many of our favourite comedians talk about science and we can learn that way too!
ReplyDeleteAnd I imagine I feel in the classroom much the same as you did when you started nursing (although with less, you know, life, at stake!). I worried that I wouldn't know everything and what if a pupil asked me something and I didn't know the answer...but now I realise we can't know everything, the trick is knowing where to find the answers.
It's amazing how much easier things (and seemingly complicated things) are to remember when you use them every day. I thought I had forgotten so much French because I hadn't used it for a few years...but it's all still in there just hidden away waiting to be teased out.
Brains; bloody amazing if you ask me.
I often have that panic - I don't know enough about the topic to teach it! I like that it's a process of learn, learn, relearn, unlearn, connect, disconnect, reconnect (not in that order.) The more you learn/read and understand and become confident in what you know/your opinion and the backing arguments, the easier they'll come.
ReplyDeleteYou come across as someone who is very knowledgeable, Nic. I think it is that we do not always reaslise the way the brain retains information which causes us to panic on having 'forgotten things'.
ReplyDeleteAll it needs in reality is the trigger, the pointer to the place your mind has stored that random joke or fact, or piece of information. Whether that is a journal reference or a line from a poem is all down to what it is you specialise in (I am an English Grad, if that helps it make sense).
I am a strong believer that people are constantly learning, constantly striving and changing. Those links and bridges between incidental pieces of information are forever connecting and re-connecting as we go through our day to day lives. I think of it almost like an endless mass of atoms and neurons, linked together, turning and linking again. The filling system of the brain.
It is good to strive to learn more in the things that interest and excite you - whether for your job, or for the hobbies that interest you.
I say go for it, jump in, feet first, hands up in celebration and drink in whatever knowledge may come your way.